2. There are bigger things to worry about than the size of your trousers
It would be foolish of me to argue that worrying about one’s physical shortcomings is a frivolous and unworthy cause. It’s valid. Your body is all yours, and as “things that occupy your psyche” goes, it’s a good one to take up your time. For some, the weight and pressure of this very topic is consuming, and the preoccupation of perfection can overshadow the majesty of this gift. I’ve learned that my life is easier when instead of worrying about my shortcomings, I spend my precious time in gratitude. My reasoning comes from a light bulb moment I had in my early twenties. I realised how powerful my body was, despite the bumpy bits.
My nephew is only a month old and already he looks like a completely different little person than the newborn we first met. His little frame is constantly changing. He’s growing, learning how to move in different ways, learning how to make new faces, new sounds. Soon he’ll be strong enough to roll over, wriggle so hard he moves places, stands and walks. He’ll get better at that and one day he’ll start running, climbing, focusing his efforts until he can coordinate brilliant goal-scoring soccer moves. Our bodies are incredible instruments, a great gift. I’m lucky enough to be void of any major physical challenges- I can move powerfully, clumsily, in a way that creates humour. My body is so in sync with my personality and my mind, that it will express my feelings in its own visual language. Weird. Amazing!
I’m starting to find it offensive when others (and sometimes myself) fail to acknowledge the awesome and instead focus on comparably irrelevant “flaws” (this limb is too short. There’s too much flesh going on there. There’s not enough meat going on there. That’s not smooth enough. Those aren’t even). I wish I could visit my 12 year old self who cried over the size of her thighs compared to her skinny brothers thighs. I’d show her how important those thighs were, what they could do. I’d tell her that instead of worrying, she had bigger fish to fry and those minutes would be better spent trying to not suck at maths so that future Hollie would have a shot at investment banking. I hope the eighty-year-old-me would thank the present-day-me for partnering up with a dude who chose me for the inside me rather than aesthetic me.
Some worries worth your time:
a) World peace
b) Whether or not you’re polite enough
c) The relationship between you and your next door neighbour (because one day you WILL need to use their bathroom)
d) Spelling your / you’re and their / there / they’re correctly (because it’s the most basic tell)
e) Your credit
f) Your short term memory (because forgetting your pin number in a crowded Sainsbury’s is the most humiliating trauma to befall anyone)
g) How you treat strangers
i) Getting enough sleep (because this will make or break your day)
j) The ones you love unconditionally
k) Whether or not you’re funny
l) How much you care about other people
m) How much you’re learning
n) Whether or not you’re good at advice