I’m not a musical-theater-sing-songy-buff-groupie. It’s just not in my blood. Well, that’s a lie- it’s in my blood. But if your parents ran around the house singing West Side Story and Joseph and the Technicolored Jacket or whatever, YOU’D also put a lot of effort into avoiding it at all costs.

Having said that, I went to a showing of Wicked at the Victoria Apollo with a couple of very good friends, and was actually very impressed. I still don’t know why the dragon was presiding over the whole affair, but the show- the music, storyline and staging were all amazing. It has changed my mind about the whole affair.

… But then I went to see Les Mis (the movie, not the show) and I was instantly put back into my original frame of mind. WHY SING EVERY SINGLE WORD? My philosophy is that if you’ve ran out of palpable tunes, don’t just go with it and sing every little thing. Also if you can’t carry a tune, don’t sing. I’m looking at you Russell Crowe. Hugh has the kind of singing voice that makes me turn the radio off. WHO KNOWS WHY Anne Hathaway got an Oscar for her performance- she was in the movie for all of 5 minutes. The only good one was Eddie Redmayne, and he didn’t even make it on the movie poster. For shame. In short the whole thing was miserable. But I guess that’s the whole point of the show?

Harrods must be the Disneyland of mega rich oil-stock-arms-people. Raise your hand if you can shell out 8,000 GBP for a pair of slippers? Mine were 2 GBP from Primark, please and thanks. I’ll stick to that, no matter how wealthy I get in this life.

But in all seriousness, Harrods is a thing to behold. First, it will take you a good 15 minutes to take in the beautiful window displays that are so intricately and artistically designed. You’ll spend another hour in total staring, gob open, at the crown moldings and tile work of the interior of the place. Then you’ll lose the use of your jelly like legs when you spy a few price tags here and there. It really is the height of decadence- but it’s exquisite and it’s motivation enough to make you want to make as much money as you possibly can so that you can feel like you fit in.

I’m not saying I didn’t buy anything. I got a chocolate. It cost me that day’s rent and they didn’t even give me a Harrods bag. Rude.

So many Americans have asked me what exactly is typical “British” food? This of course will be after they’ve scoffed over fish and chips blah blah blah. I don’t have the heart to tell them that t e c h n i c a l l y, due to the percentage of our more exotic population, our national dish is actually an Indian curry. So for the sake of ever important appearances, let’s say that the Sunday roast is a typical traditional British meal suitable only for the fearless stomach and bottomless pocket.

From the outside, the museum looks like your typical English museum- trying so hard to be a Grecian palace, though stained by early revolutionary soot and pollution. But you walk through those regular chunky wooden doors, sneakily evade that donation box, and then before you know it you’re standing in a whitewash of marble and light. The roof is a dome of cloudy glass, angularly canopied all around. It’s sleek, it’s clean, it’s breathtaking.

I chose to visit the Egyptians and the Greeks, mainly because the idea of the mummy’s seemed like the trainwreck I wanted to ogle, and well the Greeks were right there next to me. I skipped all of that pottery that you see on the Hercules DVD Extras and went straight to the marble statues, which were incredible. The amount of detail contained in these sculptures just made my ego shrink to the size of a bean. I’m positive I could never sculpt like that- the folds of fabric and the veins and wrinkles of the subject are all so real. You can see movement there, you can see expression and emotion.

The Egyptians I love because they took everything just so seriously. It’s a good quality I suppose, but I just love to see how dedicated they were to their upper classes. Their symbolism is to be revered, and their sense of pride in life and in death is admirable. My favourite thing about them was the attention they took in decorating coffins. Well first off, the number of coffins they got ended up being like a Russian doll situation. But secondly, the intricate paintwork that went into decorating each box as a tribute to that persons life and family- it was just a lovely idea. I’d be ok with that if and when I perish.

It’s on the top of a lot of touristy lists of things to do- and frankly I can’t tell you why. If you want to see a fancy interchange between ornately dressed men who scream remarks at one another that could be interpreted as either compliments or reprimands (one never knows), then maybe this is the thing for you. I opted to watch the changing of the guards as well as the daily inspection of the Queen’s horsemen. I figured throwing in some wildlife might spice up the whole charade, but sadly it was just as dull as the initial guard changing. It went on for far too long and I found myself feeling anxious for the actual horses. The captain guy who shouts and screams at everyone systematically dismisses the best horses first and it felt like watching a sad gym class where the fat kid gets picked last. I don’t know how the captain makes his choices, because honestly all of the horses look like clones. But it’s a thorough inspection; I reckon the captain even checks to see if there’s anything between the horses’ teeth, and makes sure there’s no knots in their tails or manes. I’ll admit I got distracted by my surroundings and maybe didn’t pay close attention, but the whole thing lasted almost a full 30 minutes! That’s a whole episode of Friends, WITH commercial breaks. Once is enough for me, so if I’m ever showing you around town and you want to do this, I’ll just meet up with you later.

I almost forgot my birthday this year. I certainly forgot to register for my birthday this year. Despite this I got some lovely gifts. My parents, who usually roll their eyes at how picky I am and just give me the spending money, surprised me this year with a beautiful gift that came in a Swarovski box. And as you all know, you can never go wrong with anything that comes from Swarovski. Or Tiffany’s (next year, folks).

Anyway I was invited to spend the weekend in Yorkshire with two of my favourite people, Aunty Tricia and Uncle Tony. So I hopped on a MegaBus, which I think is the best kind of bus a) because its cheaper than a family size packet of crisps and b) because they have wifi and power sockets which meant I could work the entire time. As soon as I arrived in Leeds, I began to feel like I was in ENGLAND. It’s strange to think that I haven’t been feeling this was for the past month, but I suppose London is its own universe in and of itself. In Yorkshire, I began to feel like I was at home. The foggy air and hanging rain, the small town politeness of strangers, the smell of real grass. I was so excited to be there.

I love my aunt and uncle. Mainly because they remind me so much of my parents. Especially Tony, who could be my mother’s twin. They spoiled me silly, I really did feel like the birthday girl. We went to English pubs, visited York, watched my favourite Jane Eyre (Sorry you hated it Tone), had delicious chinese food and delectable cake, visited with more lovely family, scoured pound shops, and laughed the whole weekend through. It was really the best trip. I’m so grateful to live near family.

I am so excited to show you all this little project I was working on during my time in Germany. Working for the Church has many perks, and this was just the cherry on top. How else could a freshly graduated English major slip into the role of Editor in Chief and Head Graphic Designer of a global Headquartered office?

My assignment was to compile the media stories of 20 different countries, sift through them to find the best examples, translate them and display them in this book. I took care of the layout and the art work, and with the most incredible team of editors we completed a project that should have taken about 8 months– in ONE month.

The project was a one-off idea, mainly due to the extensive media coverage of the LDS Church in Europe in 2012. Most of it can be attributed to Mitt Romney’s campaign (Mitt got a book), as well as The Book of Mormon Musical opening in London, and other temples being built in France and Italy. Currently the book is being shared with Public Affairs teams throughout the world.

I guess the thing that most prepared me for this project was my biggest folly at University: the art of procrastination. I have said it before and I’ll say it again: my habitual last minute rush to get a paper or project done the night before it was due, has prepared me for life. Thanks to my intense exposure to this practice and mindset, I somehow have a gift with speed- brainstorming, preparation and process are all streamlined in my mind, and the whole project, whatever it may be, seems to be a concord flight. I am only grateful that the team I worked with on this project were so gracious and willing to sprint along side me too. It was really the most fun I’ve ever had.